Being Ernest

A series of events over the past few months have been very difficult for me.
Details are not important, but suffice it to say… I have been discouraged and devastated.
My feelings of despair were lifted today as I paid a visit to my dad.
The first thing I saw when I arrived was dad, sitting in a recliner, with the dog I got him for his birthday…
that alone, melted the ache in my heart and put a little smith on my face!



After a while, I had the pleasure of feeding my dad. His plate was full of hamburger, potatoes and beets.
I felt a little guilty feeding him the beets, knowing full well that if he has his wits about him,
they never would have touched his plate. But there he was, sitting there with his mouth open,
gladly accepting everything on the fork and being happy and grateful for it.

Before I knew it, my troubles were fading.

It amazes me how my dad still teaches me. He is wise – in spite of his current condition.

This moment reminded me of another tender moment when my youngest daughter fed peaches to her dying grandfather.
This is one of her strongest memories and nearly 20 years later, evokes great emotion for her.
He was another great man full of wisdom and knowledge. A man, that I knew long enough to love dearly and to miss deeply.

My husband and I often talk with each other, wondering what words of advise he would give us when one of us is
conflicted, confused or discouraged. I wonder too, what my own father would tell me today if he could speak.
It is pretty easy to guess what they would tell me about my current situations.
I am certain that it is very similar to what my husband has already told me.
I believe that it would be something like this:

Brothers and sisters, there is enough heartache and sorrow in this life without our adding to it through our own stubbornness, bitterness, and resentment.
We are not perfect.
The people around us are not perfect. People do things that annoy, disappoint, and anger. In this mortal life it will always be that way.
Nevertheless, we must let go of our grievances. Part of the purpose of mortality is to learn how to let go of such things. That is the Lord’s way.
~President Dieter F. Uchtdorf    {read/hear his full talk HERE}

Joy

After a plethora of errands, I finally sat down to start putting the finishing touches on my lesson for Sunday School tomorrow. While studying supplemental material,  I came across this quote from Richard G. Scott.

Sadness, disappointment, and severe challenge are events in life, not life itself. I do not minimize how hard some of these events are. They can extend over a long period of time, but they should not be allowed to become the confining center of everything you do. The Lord inspired Lehi to declare the fundamental truth, “Men are, that they might have joy.” ~Richard G. Scott

I appreciated the gentle reminder to seek for the joy in the simplest of things. Sunsets. Twinkling Stars. Changing Seasons. Music. Smiles. Fresh Baked Cookies. Service. Family.

Where do you find your joy?
Maybe you can find joy in his talk HERE

Dear Howard

I loved you in High School.
I even had a sweater that matched this one.

I would often pair it with khaki pants and red socks.
I even had a white belt.

Over 20 years ago, I sat in the Park West venue with the love of my life.
I was finally going to see you. I couldn’t believe it.

Then the storm came.
Lightning. Thunder, COLD rain.

First it was postponed. I waited.
It continued to rain. I waited still.
An hour later, no change. I gave up.

An exodus through the parking lot with so many other disappointed fans.
Later, a rumor that the show was to go on.
I was already 20 minutes down the canyon, soaking wet, cold and stubborn.
I did not return.

My love for you did not die.
Your greatest hits was among the first to be uploaded to my prized and newly acquired iPod.

Many attempts to reunite failed.
Events on the calendar and financial obligations took priority.
But, I promised myself we would make this happen.

Flash forward to 2011.
An event in Sandy seemed promising. FAIL.
Another event last night in St. George. FAIL.
More broken promises.

Dear, Dear Howard.
I guess it is not meant to be.
Unless, you want to come over for dinner.
That, I can do.