Look for the good

Recently, after a flight home, a tablet was inadvertently left behind on the airplane.
This was not realized until the next morning. Panic ensued and my husband and I quickly sought for answers on how to best track it down.
We were prompted to visit the airlines web page and found a lost and found claim form. We filled it out, adding every detail about the tablet that we could think of. We sent a signal to the tablet, and forced it to lock and set a password to keep personal data safe. And then we waited… each of us expecting different outcomes. A couple of weeks passed and then an unexpected email was received.
The tablet was located! Faith in mankind was restored!

I couldn’t help but wonder, what caused us to expect such contradicting outcomes.
Was it a male/female thing?
Do each of us view the world (and people) differently because of external influences? (Work, media, etc.)
Have our past experiences impacted our way of thinking?

Abraham Lincoln once said…

“If you look for the bad in people expecting to find it, you surely will.”

While that may be true, it stands to reason that the opposite is also true.
If you look for the good in people, expecting to find it, you surely will!

straightway

Last week, I was riding Trax from home to downtown where I was going to meet my husband for dinner. Along the way, at one of the stops, two individuals boarded the train. One was clearly helping or tutoring the other. She coached him as he stepped onto the car and reassured him along the way. They were both blind. At that same moment, a man that was already on the train, jumped up to help. He spoke to them, told them were handles and seats were, he took them by the arm and guided them. He made sure they were both OK. He did so, WITHOUT HESITATION. His act of kindness and service was immediate.

The most interesting moment of this incident was not the act, but what I learned about this kind stranger as I heard him talk to a woman (also a stranger to him) on the train as we continued the trip north. She was having a hard time holding a job and finding places to live. Again, without hesitation, he tried to help. He encouraged her. He tried to give her hope. He explained to her that he was just released from prison. He was in a halfway house and trying to get his life back in order and that he understood her difficulties.

I couldn’t help but ask myself…. why did I hesitate when two blind children of God stepped onto the train. Why was I not the one to come to their aid and to be the one to ensure their safety and well being? How many other times did I hesitate. How many times did I not act immediately on promptings? How many opportunities have I missed because I put them off?

I was ashamed to admit that there was any.

Matthew 4: 18-22

18 And Jesus, walking by the sea of Galilee, saw two brethren, Simon called Peter, and Andrew his brother, casting a net into the sea: for they were fishers.
19 And he saith unto them, Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men.
20 And they straightway left their nets, and followed him.
21 And going on from thence, he saw other two brethren, James the son of Zebedee, and John his brother, in a ship with Zebedee their father, mending their nets; and he called them.
22 And they immediately left the ship and their father, and followed him

Choose

Choose good friends!
We tend to become like those whom we admire. Just as in Nathaniel Hawthorne’s classic account “The Great Stone Face,” we adopt the mannerisms, the attitudes, even the conduct of those whom we admire—and they are usually our friends. Associate with those who, like you, are planning not for temporary convenience, shallow goals, or narrow ambition but rather for those things that matter most—even eternal objectives.
https://www.lds.org/youth/article/how-to-choose-good-friends?lang=eng

Choose wisely!
I believe it is of particular importance in our day, when Satan is raging in the hearts of men in so many new and subtle ways, that our choices and decisions be made carefully, consistent with the goals and objectives by which we profess to live. We need unequivocal commitment to the commandments and strict adherence to sacred covenants.
~Elder Quentin L Cook
https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2014/10/choose-wisely?lang=eng

Choose eternal life!
…we have only two eternal choices, each with eternal consequences: choose to follow the Savior of the world and thus choose eternal life with our Heavenly Father or choose to follow the world and thus choose to separate ourselves from Heavenly Father eternally. We cannot successfully choose both the safety of righteousness and the dangers of worldliness.
~Randall K Bennett
https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2011/10/choose-eternal-life?lang=eng

Choose charity!
”charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever”

Do we judge one another? Do we criticize each other for individual choices, thinking we know better, when in fact we rarely understand another’s unique circumstance or individual inspiration? Have we ever said, “She works outside the home.” Or, “Her son didn’t serve a mission.” Or, “She’s too old for a calling.” Or, “She can’t—she’s single.” Such judgments, and so many others like them, rob us of the good part, that pure love of Christ.

We also lose sight of that good part when we compare ourselves to others. Her hair is cuter, my legs are fatter, her children are more talented, or her garden’s more productive—sisters, you know the drill. We just can’t do that. We cannot allow ourselves to feel inadequate by focusing on who we aren’t instead of on who we are! …We simply cannot criticize, gossip, or judge and keep the pure love of Christ.
~Bonnie D Parkin
https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2003/10/choosing-charity-that-good-part?lang=eng

Choose not to be offended!
When we believe or say we have been offended, we usually mean we feel insulted, mistreated, snubbed, or disrespected. And certainly clumsy,embarrassing, unprincipled, and mean-spirited things do occur in our interactions with other people that would allow us to take offense.However, it ultimately is impossible for another person to offend you or to offend me. Indeed, believing that another person offended us is fundamentally false. To be offended is a choice we make; it is not a condition inflicted or imposed upon us by someone or something else.
~David A Bednar
https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2006/10/and-nothing-shall-offend-them?lang=eng

Some choices may seem more important than others, but no choice is insignificant.
  ~Thomas S Monson

boasting

I work full time. I serve in my church. I live in a neighborhood. I have friends.
I say this, not to boast, but to point out that I am exposed to all sorts of people. Often.
I hear many things.
Mostly interesting, funny, and uplifting.
Sometimes annoying, inappropriate, or  irritating.
On thing that irritates me is the constant boasting that is exhibited by a select few.
You know the – my kid was accepted to Harvard but chose to go to State College – type.

I often wonder, are these individuals even aware of how they come off to others?
Me?I Besides feeling uncomfortable being around these individuals, I feel SAD.
Sad that they are so insecure, so starved for attention, so unaware of others,
or even unaware of what they are doing. I also feel worried.
Worried, that I too, can easily fall into this category.

It seems to me, that if we direct our gratitude upward. If we acknowledge all of our blessings and successes to the Divine Being,
the person from which they came, then – and only then – will we be following the example of our Savior.
This was reinforced in my mind as I stumbled upon a Conference talk from April 1990…

In our conversations and conduct we can be much more effective if we avoid the demeaning effect of that which could be classified as boasting. We should wisely let others become aware of accomplishments by observations rather than to have us appear to flaunt them before the world. Boasting diminishes credibility and too often alienates friends, co-workers, family members, and even those who may observe us from a distance….

Consideration for the feelings of others should always be important to worthy Latter-day Saints. Rightfully we may be happy about the number of children with which we have been blessed, the missionaries who have served, the temple marriages of our offspring, and the accomplishments of family members; but others who are not so fortunate may have feelings of guilt or inadequacy. They may have been praying long and hard for the same blessings about which we are boasting. These people may feel that they are out of favor with God.

For this reason our appreciation should be sincerely felt and gratitude expressed frequently to our Father in Heaven
- but not too vocally to the world.

We would all do well to take a lesson from the Savior, who repeatedly acknowledged and gave credit to the Father in all things.

~Marvin J Ashton (read his full Conference address  HERE)

I am so grateful for such great, faithful men of God that are not afraid to teach us the things that we need to hear,
things that will draw us closer to our  Father in Heaven and our Savior.
I am grateful for this weekend, for General Conference where I will once again be edified and uplifted.
Were I can become renewed in my desire, and my actions, to be obedient and to follow the example of  Jesus Christ.…
You too, can watch it live…HERE…  [Saturday October 4th 10 AM, 2 PM / Sunday October 5th 10 AM, 2 PM]

balance

On Sunday, I fixed Chili for dinner.
I prepared it early in the morning and poured it into my crockpot to simmer while at church.
For those of you who know my naughty dog, Chester, this next sentence will make sense to you…
I put the crockpot on top of the washer in the laundry room just before leaving the house
I was the first one home and promptly attempted to transport the crockpot back into the kitchen.
As I lifted the crock pot [that was filled to the brim] the contents shifted
and before I knew it, scalding hot chili pour out onto my hand.
I set it down to regain balance, and tried once more, successfully.
By now, my hand was stinging from the incredible heat.
I followed first aid protocol and took measures to cool down the wound.
I was fortunate to only have burned a single finger.
I received a very strong example of how important balance is in our lives.
Balance is defined as mental and emotional steadiness; it is to bring into harmony or proportion.
We need balance spiritually, intellectually, physically, socially,and economically.
Over the past several months, I have assessed the balance (or lack thereof) in my own life.
I have often found myself over consumed by work.
I have neglected my physical health.
[This list could get long!]

The wise Job said, “Let me be weighed in an even balance, that God may know mine integrity”
(Job 31:6)
Talents, gifts of expression, and precious time are exhausted in swimming against too many tides

Balance in large measure is knowing the things that can be changed, putting them in proper perspective, and recognizing the things that will not change. And balance also lies in attitude. May our attitude be one of achieving balance and wisdom and understanding in all that we do.

~James E Faust

I have recently made some changes. So many more still need to take place,
but I already feel the scales are leveling out and balance is returning to my life

Assumption

a thing that is accepted as true or as certain to happen, without proof.
It is in our nature to assume. It is very difficult not to… We see, we interpret, we react.
Assumption is necessary for us to function in our daily lives, however, it can also become dangerous.

Termites are silent killers; it takes years before you even notice the damage they've done to a home! Like termites, assumptions slowly eat away at our respect, trust, and love for one another. But we can start healing our relationships by assuming the best of each other.
~Henry Winkler

Communication is KEY.

Healing

Today, on the anniversary of 9-11, Taylor and I continued our tradition of visiting Healing Field in Sandy, Utah.
I will never forget where I was the day this event happened.
I will never forget calling my parents in Canada while they were serving their mission.
I will never forget gasping out loud as the first tower fell
…and again with the second collapse.
I will never forget the power of a Nation, that raised above this tragedy
and came together in such a remarkable way. With pride. With faith. With God.

It is a shame, that while we will never forget what happened our our land
we easily and often forget our God.
May we turn our thoughts to Him daily and enable Him and our Savior
to heal us and make us stronger.
Physically. Emotionally. Spiritually.

It is constancy that God would have from us. Tragedies are not merely opportunities to give Him a fleeting thought, or for momentary insight to His plan for our happiness. Destruction allows us to rebuild our lives in the way He teaches us, and to become something different than we were. We can make Him the center of our thoughts and His Son, Jesus Christ, the pattern for our behavior. We may not only find faith in God in our sorrow. We may also become faithful to Him in times of calm.   ~Thomas S. Monson

Patience

“I believe that a lack of patience is a major cause of the difficulties and unhappiness in the world today. Too often, we are impatient with ourselves, with our family members and friends, and even with the Lord. We seem to demand what we want right now, regardless of whether we have earned it, whether it would be good for us, or whether it is right.”

~Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin

“Patience is tied very closely to faith in our Heavenly Father. Actually, when we are unduly impatient, we are suggesting that we know what is best—better than does God. Or, at least, we are asserting that our timetable is better than his. Either way we are questioning the reality of God’s omniscience [knowledge].”

~Elder Neal A. Maxwell

On Tuesday, Evan and I volunteered to provide FHE at Atria, the retirement center near our home.
Let me rephrase, Evan volunteered us to provide FHE. It was a stressful week and I was not looking forward to it. I had too much to do. I didn’t have the time. I wanted to do what I wanted to do!

While sorting through lesson ideas, I stumbled upon a lesson on patience. It clicked. What hooked me was a statement at the end of the lesson. It really put the quality of patience in perspective.

Patience was required of Noah and his family. We talk about “forty days and forty nights” as though they had to live in the ark with all those animals for a month and a half. Well, forty days and forty nights was only a fraction of their endurance. For instance, do you remember that after they went into the ark and closed the door, they were inside the ark for seven days before the Flood began? Now, would that be a test of faith or what? Would you decide, about the fifth day, that it would be awfully nice to spend the weekend picking buttercups in the meadow rather than cleaning the elephants’ stalls and that maybe Noah had made a big mistake?

Then the rains began. It was not until the fortieth day of this torrential downpour and flooding that the water was deep enough to “lift [the ark] up above the earth.” And then “the waters prevailed upon the earth an hundred and fifty days.” We’re up to 197 days so far.

The scripture doesn’t tell us how many days it took for the waters to recede, but it says that the ark came to rest on the mountains of Ararat on the seventeenth day of the seventh month, and it took until the first day of the tenth month for the tops of the mountains to become visible. If we hypothesize a month of thirty days—then we need to add another seventy-three days.

Then they waited forty days to send out the raven and the dove, seven more days for the second flight of the dove, who returned with the olive branch, and a final seven days for the third flight. It sounds as if it then took another month plus twenty-seven days before they received the command of the Lord to go forth from the ark. This comes to a total of 401 days. That’s a long time to be cooped up in a floating zoo—a year, a month, and six days!

So the story of Noah teaches us that there will be adversity, that it will last a long time, and that it will require reserves of patience that seem superhuman.

After all was said and done, it ended up being a perfect evening. Somehow, the stress of service is what reduced my stress. I still had the time I needed to get everything done. I am, however, a little stressed about what the Lord has in store for me that will require superhuman patience.

(Original lesson HERE)

Inspirational

“Life is perfect for none of us.
Rather than being judgmental and critical of each other,
may we have the pure love of Christ
for our fellow travelers
in this journey through life.”

~Thomas S. Monson~

Bridges

I read a quote posted on a friends blog.
I immediately looked for the source so I could read the rest of the text.
I am so thankful I did.

In May, President Monson spoke at Dixie College
as they celebrated 100 years.

He spoke of three bridges:

1] the bridge of attitude

"Attitude can make all the difference in our lives, and we control our attitude," he said. "It can make us miserable or happy, content or dissatisfied. To a great degree, it can make us strong or weak."

It was the philosopher William James who developed the "as if" principle: If you want a virtue, act as if you already have it. If you want to be brave, act as if your are brave. If you want to be happy, act happy.

"Change your attitude by trying the 'as if" principle — it can work for all of us."

2] the bridge of integrity

"Being true to oneself is anything but easy if the moral standards of one's associates conflict with his or her own," he said. "The herd instinct is strong in the human animal, and the phrase 'Everybody else is doing it' has an insidious attraction. ...

"Nothing takes more strength than swimming against the current. You, my friends, are strong and must at times decide to swim against that current."

3] the bridge of service

"During your life you may achieve wealth or fame or social standing," he said. "Real success, however, comes from helping others."

All will have opportunities to serve.

"The blind and the handicapped need friendship; the aged are hungry for companionship; the young need understanding guidance; the gifted are starved for encouragement. These benefits can't be conferred by reaching for your checkbook. Personal service is direct and human."

… one's personal service may not be dramatic, but it can bolster human spirits, clothe cold bodies, feed hungry people, comfort grieving hearts and lift precious souls to new heights.

"My young friends, your life will be fuller, richer and happier if you seek for and find opportunities to be of service."

I find myself, again, full of short comings.
It seems, that the simplest things, are the most difficult to live by.
I believe my attitude and integrity are in line with His teachings,
but I struggle with the simple acts of service.
I tend to “pick and choose”.
I know I need to just “go and do”!

I think I will start with Visiting Teaching…